Tuesday, December 26, 2023

Year- End Countdown: My Top 5 Songs in 2023

Last year was a real struggle for me. I couldn’t manage to put together my year-end countdown of favorite songs. Workload consumed my days, leaving no room for my beloved music. It felt like a crime to indulge in leisure during office hours. I constantly reminded myself to stay focused and finish on time, fearing another late night at the desk.

So, that’s the backstory of my 2022 song list failure.

But here we are now, a tad early for this entry. Still, I’ve adopted a rebranded motto: “better late than never.” After all, it’s better to be ahead of schedule than perpetually behind, right?

Enough blubbering—let’s dive into my Top 5 Songs of 2023:


1. I GUESS THIS IS JUST ANOTHER SONG 'BOUT TOKYO?


The first time I heard about Rina Sawayama was during a random YouTube interview with New Jeans. I didn’t know much about her at that point, but perhaps I had caught a passing glimpse of her during a Head in the Clouds concert clip in my feed. And that was the extent of it.

However, when Minji mentioned Rina’s name during an interview question about artists she’d been following recently, she pronounced it with utmost clarity: “RI-NA SA-WA-YA-MA.” Her English-speaking voice flowed effortlessly, a soothing surprise to the ears. Honestly, it was Minji who piqued my curiosity, prompting me to search for Rina on Spotify and explore her music.

And so, I listened to my first Rina Sawayama song. I’m grateful that Minji’s interview randomly landed on my YouTube feed because “Tokyo Love Hotel” is an absolute bop! It’s become my favorite so far, and I haven’t even scratched the surface of Rina’s musical library.

Listening to “Tokyo Love Hotel” feels like embarking on a reckless midnight escapade. The city’s breath is amplified along the deserted roads, with light posts casting orange and soft blue-violet sparkles against my wakeful eyes. You giggle uncontrollably, too shy to express your giddiness openly, fearing you might disturb the comfortable solitude of the moment. Together, you own the world, just as Rina lyrically confesses that she wants Him all to herself.

Then, during the chorus, "Tokyo" takes on a soulful transformation. I’m transported to an idyllic place—white, billowy clouds against eye-straining sunlight from the open skies. It’s a heavenly sensation, and I sway with the ebb and flow of love’s moments and hopeful encounters. But Rina Sawayama is done with the shows and fleeting encounters; she no longer checks into the Tokyo Love Hotel. She craves His love exclusively.

Perhaps this is just another song about Tokyo, but for me, it’s an enchanting journey through Rina’s musical universe.


2. RUN AWAY, BUT WE'RE RUNNING IN CIRCLES



In 2019, a song was released that has etched itself into my soul this year. The reason? I can’t quite pinpoint it.

I vividly recall the moment—I was setting up my dual monitors for my relatively new job. Testing the audio, I navigated to YouTube. There, in the thumbnail, was Post Malone, striking an end-of-war pose. I’d heard the song “Circles” a few times before, but I hadn’t truly savored its entirety.

Yet, “Circles” lingered in my mind. It became my go-to during karaoke sessions and the soundtrack to my YouTube browsing.

Initially, I listened to it solely for its pounding beats, urging me to nod my head and pump my fist as if I were hammering away at something. But then, as I paid closer attention to the lyrics while it played in the background, a pang of guilt washed over me.

It was a sad song.

Despite its engaging sound, “Circles” wasn’t meant for carefree dancing. When Post Malone crooned, “Maybe you don’t understand what I’m going through,” I envisioned him—shoulders tense, exhaling hopelessly. The bridge intensified this feeling, transporting me back to my darkest days.

[Maybe you don't understand what I'm going through
It's only me
What you got to lose?
Make up your mind, tell me
What are you gonna do?
It's only me
Let it go]

During those moments—lonely or otherwise—you realize that no matter how you try to simplify your struggles for others, they’ll never truly grasp it. Even well-intentioned responses like “I know what you’re feeling” or “I’ve been through the same shit” fall flat, mere echoes in the vast cavern of your emotions.

When they ask, “What’s wrong?” you hesitate, unsure of how to respond. The conversation loops in circles, and you grow weary of explaining yourself. Eventually, you find solace in the simplest words: “It’s only me.”  


3. GUESS I WON'T EVER MIND CRISPING UP ON YOUR BACKBURNER

BACKBURNER - NIKI

I'm a la la lost you and lowkey baby. 

I know some of NIKI’s better-known songs, as I mentioned earlier, but not those that truly solidified her artistry in the music arena.

During my initial listens to the ‘Nicole’ album, I didn’t pay much attention to the lyrics, honestly. The song titles certainly scream heartbreak, emotive longing, and taking chances. However, I was too immersed in her voice. It’s simple—a good kind of simple, I must say—but also very familiar. It’s a voice you’ve heard somewhere, but not just anywhere. Personally, it’s her voice that makes her relatable to me. It’s affable, light, and vivid. It evokes a reachable imagination and a feeling of something closer to home.

It was NIKI who introduced the term ‘backburner’ to me. Before that, I had already listened to High School in Jakarta, Take A Chance with Me, Before, and even Oceans and Engines. All of those were great listens, even earning the coveted LSS (Last Song Syndrome) certification. However, what intrigued me the most about ‘Backburner’ was the curiosity it sparked with its title. What was it all about? Without resorting to Google, I delved into the lyrics, connecting the dots to grasp its essence.

My loose conclusion was that perhaps it’s about being a “rebound”. Still, I recognize that it’s not something I can personally relate to. Yet, as I mentioned earlier, NIKI’s voice is simple in a welcoming way. It’s as if this song beckons you whenever you’re ready to understand it. She’ll sing-song the words to you slowly, enunciating them with patience. 

If I had to pick a favorite from her album, it would undoubtedly be ‘Backburner’. For some reason, listening to this song leaves me feeling heartbroken—much like how Taylor Swift’s ‘All Too Well’ shattered me. However, here, NIKI sounds more hopeful than reminiscent. It’s a foolish hope, directed toward someone who can only want her when it's convenient. 


4. WHEN THE BONES ARE GOOD, THE REST DON'T MATTER

THE BONES - MARREN MORRIES, HOZIER

Honestly, I enjoy this song just as it is. Well, a big part of that enjoyment stems from Hozier’s biblical voice—listening to him feels like experiencing an audio version of the Holy Bible. But there’s another reason: I genuinely revel in the vibe of the song.

Weird as it may seem, that’s how the song affects me. It allows me to picture myself in an open car, wind tousling my hair, and I’m singing the chorus with a carefree abandon:

[When the bones are good, the rest don't matter

Yeah, the paint could peel, the glass could shatter

Let it break, 'cause you and I remain the same

When there ain't a crack in the foundation

Baby, I know any storm we're facing will

Blow right over while we stay put

The house don't fall when the bones are good

When the bones are good]

Then Hozier enters, transforming the song into a celestial hymn. The heavens fill with horn-whistled cherubs and feathery confetti. And when both voices converge in the chorus, everything feels right, and the rest becomes inconsequential.

And what happens when the bones are good, you ask?


5. WHY CAN'T WE BE FRIENDS, WHEN WE ARE LOVERS?

SINCERITY IS SCARY - THE 1975 

Sincerity Is Scary has remained my steadfast favorite throughout the entire year. It’s my go-to song when I couldn't think of any songs to lull me when the afternoon boredom strikes in. The track offers an effortless listening experience and serves as a catalyst for my daydreams, particularly when Matt launches into the chorus with practiced ease:

[Why can't we be friends, when we are lovers?
Cause it always ends with us hating each other
Instead of calling me out, you should be pulling me in
I've just got one more thing to say]