House of Memory

There's someone died in our neighborhood. It was all too sudden. I didn't know him and most likely so was he to me. But not's the story about. It was supposed to be the usual face in our neighborhood where summer energy was on its peak. Everyone was on their spot fanning away their seasonal outburst of grumpiness towards the heat while kids were at their own phase, absorbed and oblivious to any kind of inconvenience. I was also planted to my seat and doing my actual task of listening to a podcast. I was absorbed too but still grounded to the other noises polluting the surrounding. Then I heard a few people panicking about something, the air seemed like it turned dry and heartstopping, and distant voices were trying to reach out something I couldn't make out. But given the jostling nature of our street, I was made to believe that nothing serious happened at that brief moment, like it was just a loud and confused noise and there's nothing worthy from it that I had to

While watching Stranger Things earlier, I instinctively slide down my phone to see how many hours have already gone by while I was laying down on the floor. "Ugh, only 10 minutes before it hit 4 pm" , I  silently exclaimed under my breath. Rest days always feel so short, like you haven't processed everything that happened for the past weekdays, and here you are now thinking about how can you squeeze in everything you have planned beforehand when it feels like 24 hours are not enough.  I woke up today rather early, but my nose felt heavy because of cold that's why I couldn't bring myself to get up right away. I was debating inside whether should I go to Kim's Christening since I also feel guilty of losing the chance to see the team since it has already been a while and certainly it will take longer again to hangout with them. As expected, I didn't go simply because I don't feel good and I need this day to regain the energy I've lost from the past we

For the past week, I've never been okay. My head is heavier than usual. My heart has been skipping a beat with panic. My eyes feel like crying at any moment. And in the midst of all of these, I remained patient. Days have been so hard. I couldn't sleep well and I don't want to get up carrying all my responsibilities heavy heartedly. I couldn't eat well. I couldn't chew my food because it tastes bland and my mind is thinking about my work. I don't feel like drinking because I am somewhere else and I just want to survive this hell. Why do I have a lot of tasks? Why I am always chasing time? Why I just don't have time to breathe? This whole thing might be making me feel alive and it is because I am now feeling numb. I just want to rest. I just want to sleep without much worries. I want to get up without effort. At any moment, I feel like I am close to crying. And I don't want that to happen. Once I cry because of this, I might cry everything out.  Now. I am